The top of the journal entry is torn from the book. The ragged edge of the remaining page looks as if it were singed.
… but that donkey brained assistant of mine swore he had no idea where my socks were. I was almost ready to give up altogether, but cold feet and a spiteful desire to prove him wrong compelled me to search his room. A thorough search of his meagre belongings turned up my pipe (missing the screen, that shall come out of his pay), three mouldy heels of bread, and a pamphlet entitled “The Lusty Adventures of Trixie Bigbottom”. I confiscated it in the interests of protecting his young and impressionable mind. After a purely academic perusal of the work I found it lacking in both plot and character development. However, its use of adverbs was impressive. I was about to concede to the fact that my socks had indeed disappeared from our current dimension when a flash of pale blue wiggling between two floorboards caught my attention. Grabbing the thread, which was undeniably from my socks (having worn said pair for over ten years now I am intimately familiar with their hue), I found something was pulling the other end.
I called for Deen and instructed him to pull up the floorboards immediately so I could retrieve them. An iron bar and several very dramatic grunts later he finally managed to remove the boards. At first I thought I must be in some sort of waking dream (a common occurrence since the unfortunate exploding Dream Recording Pillow incident), but the look on Deen’s face told me he saw it too. There, amongst the dirt and detritus underneath the floor of my quarters, were four little mice-men scurrying about with my socks!
I scooped the tiny thieves up and incarcerated them in Polly’s birdcage (Maker rest her soul). Once I ensured the well being of my socks I entered into an exhausting day and night of research until I finally discovered the identity of the sock stealers - it was the Loogus. Commonly found in the Winterlands, this industrious race inhabits the nooks and crannies of homes and university dormitories. They are nocturnal in nature and have a magpie-like attraction to woollen items. I was fortunate to intercept their little heist when I did, as my socks would surely be unraveled at this point and used to line their little nefarious nest.
I will be sending Deen to root out the den of these creatures tomorrow, but until then my socks are staying on my feet. Let those little buggers try to get them now.
~ From the Journal of Professor Digby Q. Wentworth, Department of Uninvented Inventions
… but that donkey brained assistant of mine swore he had no idea where my socks were. I was almost ready to give up altogether, but cold feet and a spiteful desire to prove him wrong compelled me to search his room. A thorough search of his meagre belongings turned up my pipe (missing the screen, that shall come out of his pay), three mouldy heels of bread, and a pamphlet entitled “The Lusty Adventures of Trixie Bigbottom”. I confiscated it in the interests of protecting his young and impressionable mind. After a purely academic perusal of the work I found it lacking in both plot and character development. However, its use of adverbs was impressive. I was about to concede to the fact that my socks had indeed disappeared from our current dimension when a flash of pale blue wiggling between two floorboards caught my attention. Grabbing the thread, which was undeniably from my socks (having worn said pair for over ten years now I am intimately familiar with their hue), I found something was pulling the other end.
I called for Deen and instructed him to pull up the floorboards immediately so I could retrieve them. An iron bar and several very dramatic grunts later he finally managed to remove the boards. At first I thought I must be in some sort of waking dream (a common occurrence since the unfortunate exploding Dream Recording Pillow incident), but the look on Deen’s face told me he saw it too. There, amongst the dirt and detritus underneath the floor of my quarters, were four little mice-men scurrying about with my socks!
I scooped the tiny thieves up and incarcerated them in Polly’s birdcage (Maker rest her soul). Once I ensured the well being of my socks I entered into an exhausting day and night of research until I finally discovered the identity of the sock stealers - it was the Loogus. Commonly found in the Winterlands, this industrious race inhabits the nooks and crannies of homes and university dormitories. They are nocturnal in nature and have a magpie-like attraction to woollen items. I was fortunate to intercept their little heist when I did, as my socks would surely be unraveled at this point and used to line their little nefarious nest.
I will be sending Deen to root out the den of these creatures tomorrow, but until then my socks are staying on my feet. Let those little buggers try to get them now.
~ From the Journal of Professor Digby Q. Wentworth, Department of Uninvented Inventions
